At my grandparents’ house for dinner a few nights ago, I was talking to my grandpa about college. I was worried about making the wrong decision, not doing enough in high school, and not getting in.\

To this, my grandpa responded: “Be gentle. What will happen is what is right.”

Planted amid my thoughts of GPAs and acceptance rates, this was one of the last things I was expecting to hear. And, perhaps, it was what I needed to hear most.

Caught in the dead of winter, the upcoming months are a time when many begin to lose hope. We lose hope in our abilities. We lose hope in our futures.

We begin to believe, most dangerously, that we are alone. Alone with our fears, our worries, our plaguing insecurities.

It’s at moments like this — moments of doubt and stress — when I think my grandfather’s words are most applicable. Instead of turning to competition, cooperate. Instead of hardening in the heat of adversity, soften.  Instead of falling into a cycle of anger and bitterness, choose to lean on one another.

Because while no human is immune to fear, there is no fear invincible to the power of kindness to destroy it.

So, be gentle.

And while you make this decision of kindness, simultaneously embrace the fact that everything is not on your shoulders. Instead, trust your ability to thrive under situations that you can’t yet predict.

As impossible as it may seem, will yourself to the universe. We only lose our ability to effect change when we succumb to the idea that we are omnipotent. Instead, try to achieve your limits, but accept them as that: limits.

Rather than clenching your teeth over flickering opportunities, trust for a second that the chances that remain — the chances that you have worked for — hold your happiness.

It’s treacherously easy to forget that grades and school are simply one facet of our lives.  We beat ourselves up when we don’t get enough points, we live for the weekends, and we tell ourselves that it’s okay to consume our lives with something we don’t enjoy right now because we’ll be free in two years, in four years, in six years, in ten years.

When did we start counting down the years of our lives?  When did we stop seeing the present as anything but a reality?

School is important, and working hard is important, but being happy is also important.  And in order to be happy, we need to let go of some of the wires and weights that we strap around ourselves in our attempts to get everything “right.”

Take a breath, and embrace the present instead of living for an imagined future.  Try to find things that you love that you can do every day, however small they are.  Trust that everything will be okay, and if it isn’t, trust that you will be okay.

And, as my grandfather told me, believe that what will happen is what is right.