A fellow passenger on a f;ight home from a college visit shares a personal experience and offers advice.
“You interested in banging that girl across the aisle?” Keith asked.
“What?” I was shocked for I hadn’t known him for more than five minutes. I had also never seen this girl in my entire life.
“I can tell you’re interested in her. You’re shy? It’s fine, I’ll get you two introduced.”
I hurriedly tried to block her from his point of view. “No, it’s fine. Really,” I stammered, “I already have a girlfr-”
“Hi there, what’s your name?” Keith said in his gruff voice.
“Vera.”
“Oh that’s exotic, I like that,” he said. “And you are?” he said, indicating me.
I hesitated and introduced myself. In the dusky ambient light, I was practically incandescent. She thankfully had a guy traveling with her and turned back to converse with him excitedly.
He leaned in towards me, gave a chuckle and said “Too bad. It looks like she’s already interested in that guy. I like her though; she has spunk.”
Keith is 51.
“So what business did you have in Philadelphia?” he asked, completely ignoring the previous incident. By this time, we were ascending into the clear skies.
I told him I was heading home from Duke University and the school was a great fit overall.
“Don’t sugercoat it,” he said in a low growl. “Go on, tell me what you really thought—what was your name again?”
He gave the impression of a grandfather who knew a lot about how the world worked, and knew that he knew it. He cursed readily and was blunt with his statements, but I could see that he believed every word of what he was saying for he spoke loudly and with conviction. So loudly, in fact, that many people on the plane turned and stared at us.
I found out that he worked as a market salesman and told him that I was going into medicine. Initially, I thought he was being an ass, but he didn’t give a damn what I thought.
“These people around us probably want to cart me off in handcuffs, but I don’t care,” Keith said with a shrug. “You seem like you’re interested, and I hope I’m not boring you.”
Before I could agree with his statement, a flight stewardess gave him an overly sweet “Do you want anything to drink, sir?”
Keith asked for a shot of vodka.
“We don’t serve alcohol to those who are already drunk,” she responded, her voice becoming even more saccharine.
“Yes ma’am,” he said, murmuring an insult that I couldn’t catch. Ignoring her, he went on to say to me “You’re a total brainiac, aren’t you? Just looking at you, I can tell. So analytical and number-oriented. I mean, you go through school and just learn all the crap that they feed you. Not once do you hunker down and say ‘what if this isn’t right?’ Not once do you walk into a room and declare what you’re really thinking. People might not like you if you did that, but they will respect you.”
I nodded, taking a sip of my concentrate orange juice.
“Doctors these days, they don’t know how to deal with people anymore,” he went on. “You said you were thinking of becoming a doctor, right? Well, let me tell you, so many of them are too number-oriented. I don’t want to know the statistics when there are lives on the line. I want to be taken care of by a compassionate human being. I want to know that my loved ones are getting the same treatment.”
His face took on a somber appearance for the first time during our conversation.
“While I was surfing in Maui, I got a phone call,” he said quietly. “I got a phone call about how my dad had a heart aneurysm and I left straight away. When I saw him, he was hooked up to all these respirators. The doctors called me out, and told me I had to make a decision about whether to cut my father’s legs or not. I’m the oldest son.”
He swallowed with a loud gulp and took a deep breath to steady himself.
“The blood wasn’t going to his legs, and the doc said ‘if you don’t do this, there won’t be enough to keep his core alive.’ These guys were as cold as ice. I told him ‘if it’s going to keep him alive, cut them off.’ I flew back just feeling empty. There was no sympathy. Doctors know the science, the anatomy and physiology, but you guys don’t know the emotional side.”
“I’m sorry for your loss,” I said simply, trying to put as much emotion as I could muster into those few words.
After a few moments of quiet, he abruptly began, “I think it’s the worst thing to go into your grave and not have asked any questions. That’s just a vapid life. Live it up, make a difference in other people’s lives and enjoy yourself. That’s why I wanted you to talk to Vera over there. You never know when your time will be up.”
Following his reminder of my inaction, we sat in silence, and I took the chance to slip away to the restroom, praying no turbulence would hit while I was relieving myself. The flight attendant who refused to serve Keith alcohol was near the restroom and asked me if I wanted to switch to another seat. I pondered the issue and told her I was fine and that she would know if I changed my mind.
When I came back, I decided to take a chance and start the conversation.
“You know, I’ve never taken an aspirin or Tylenol in my life.”
“Are you crapping me?” He gave a throaty laugh. “I’ve done everything there is to do out there, growing up in the 70s. If you can keep your body and mind clean, then don’t let anyone give you crap about it. You can go out and get messed up any day of the week, but people like me can’t turn back the clock.”
I agreed wholly with him, and we chatted on and off for the better part of the next hour before he finally said he had said all he could think of.
“I’m not really done, but I think I’m just bugging you now,” he said, coughing a few times. He stared out at the sunset and closed his eyes, a wry smile forming on his lips.
I didn’t wake him for the rest of the flight.
As I was getting off the plane, the same flight attendant looked at me with a glimmer in her eyes, saying “You should get a medal or something for enduring him.”
I smiled back at her in polite agreeability and coughed out a quiet “thanks” before stepping into the humid St. Louis air.
Keith was right. I needed to take chances. I needed to become a doctor who is concerned with patients instead of diseases, using my knowledge to comfort and care for people, not just counting and calculating statistics. In his words, I needed “to just grow a pair, look the world in the eye and put myself out there.”